Often it comes in waves; crashing, relentless, desperate waves
the memories I’d meant to forget but never got around to.
the loved ones I never meant to forget but did
and the ones who made me believe, for the sweetest of seconds, that they loved me, and that’d be enough (picture mine, Normandy France)
Literally I have been at this place before. Moorhead is where I spend a great deal of my time, or have, over the last three years and it is good to be back, but I'm also feeling the past pain from this place. I have loved a lot of people in this town, and lost them.
I have gotten the news of a lot of pain in this place; several deaths, bad dates, lost friendships, almost lovers, actual lovers.
I know when I start seeing people again, and meet my roommate and reunite with my other two roommates I'll be happy and I'll be okay because I am now. I just didn't expect that overwhelming feeling of ache. I forget how strongly a place can hold emotions and memories.
Having been through this process before I know that once I start making new memories this feeling will subside, and likely by tomorrow it will have passed, but right now, my God, does it ache.
On the plus side I've partly decorated my room, almost completely unpacked, and have made a plan for a very productive Monday so I can spend the better part of this week just relaxing before the chaos of school resumes in one week from tomorrow.
That's really all I have, I just wanted to capture that moment in the healing process so the next time I can be comforted by knowing it gets better and I'll be okay.
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